Family Ministry

SIX TRAITS TO BUILD HEALTHY FAMILIES
Committment (Part one of a series)
Appreciation and Affection (Part two of a series)
Positive Communication and Spending Time Together (Part three of a series)
Spiritual Well Being (Part four of a series)
Manage Stress and Survive Crisis (Part five of a series)

Let’s Build Strong, Healthy Families for Christ! (Part four of a series)
Spiritual Well Being
By Kay L. Meyer

How can we help families understand the importance of spiritual well-being and building your ‘house’ on the firm foundation of Christ? The importance of spiritual well-being has been documented through Fantastic Families by Dr. Nick and Nancy Stinnett and Joe and Alice Beam. It is trait five of the six traits that help build strong, healthy families. The importance of spiritual well-being is also found throughout the Old and New Testament. “For the promise is to you and to your children and to all that are far off, everyone whom the Lord our God calls to Himself (Acts 2:39). And these words which I command you this day shall be upon your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise (Deut. 6:6-7). Father’s do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Eph. 6:4). So, you want to help your family in this area? Where do you begin? 

Make sure you have a good relationship with the Lord! You can’t help your husband, wife, children, or grandchildren if you are far from God. Your relationship with the Lord important! He loves you! He suffered in your place! He died for you! He wants you to have an abundant life. And, He rose from the dead so that you will have eternal life with Him. Recognize and admit that you are not perfect. Christ is the perfect once. Look to the Lord for forgiveness. Confess your sins, make prayer a priority, enjoy Christian fellowship, study God’s Word, and attend worship services regularly.  

Be concerned about the spiritual well-being of each member of your family. Pray daily for each member. Ask the Lord to help them grow in God’s grace. Encourage them to rely upon God. Help them understand that they are saved by faith (Eph. 2:8,9), not by their good works. Live your faith in the home. Forgive each other as Christ has forgiven you. And attend church and Sunday school together.

Recently I interviewed Dr. Dick Hardel on a Family Shield radio program. We discussed “Growing Healthy Christian Families.” As the former president of Youth and Family Institute and a popular author, his career has focused on helping parents and church leaders learn to nurture and grow faith in the home. I asked, ”What can we do to help parents and families pass on faith to the next generation?” He shared the importance of implementing the Four Keys for Nurturing Faith in the Home. They include: 1) Caring conversations, 2) Family Devotions, 3) Family Service Projects; and 4) Family Rituals and Traditions.

Caring conversations involve having children and family members overhear us talking about God in our daily life and talking together about God and faith. Dick shared an example, “I was at my daughter’s and my 4 ½ year old granddaughter asked,” ‘Now, grandpa, the angels helped Jesus when he was in the Garden, didn’t they? What else do angels do, grandpa?’ I responded, “What a good question! You have obviously heard your parents having a conversation about this topic. Let’s take a walk and talk about angels some more.”

Remind parents that they don’t have to have all the answers. Just talk with your children and help them see that the Lord is important. 

When caring conversations are a normal part of family life God’s presence is felt in the home. That’s faith talk. Youth and Family Institute produces many excellent resources that can help families talk about their faith. One is called Faith Talk with Children. Information about this and other resources is available at www.youthandfamilyinstitute.org.

Family Devotions are also important. Many Christian families don’t ever have devotions. Some don’t know how. Others have tried devotions and found them difficult. Hardel shared, “Families and family devotions can be messy. That is life! Life can be messy. So if little Jimmy runs and jumps during devotions and doesn’t seem to listen, that’s OK. In the middle of our messy devotions God is with us! Congregations must come along side parents and teach them how to have a devotional life in the home.

Another resource that can help families implement devotions in the home is the Youth and Family Institute Faith Chest. Directions for this wooden chest are on the website. The chest is intended to hold important paperwork and items related to our faith. But, the chest can also be used as a family worship center. Use it as the home altar. Place the Bible, candles and a colorful scarf on it. Create holy moments. Devotions should be short and age appropriate. Read a Bible story or a devotional. Act out of Bible story together. Confess your sins to one another and offer forgiveness to each other. Teach your family how to pray. Use a prayer from God’s word like the Lord’s Prayer and memorize a Bible verse together.

Family Service involves the entire family doing an activity of service to say ‘thank you’ to God. As we do family service activities we are living out our faith by doing acts of kindness for others. Do something together once a month. It doesn’t need to be a major project, simple projects are best.

What are some family service ideas and who can you help? Shovel snow for an elderly neighbor and pray for her. Travel to grandma’s and help with home repair projects and, pray as a family for those you serve. Cut your neighbor’s grass while they are on vacation and pray for them. Make a pot of soup together as a family, make a card, then deliver it together. And pray with them. Some churches organize family service projects. This is another great opportunity for family service.

Family Rituals and Traditions. Family Rituals and Traditions help show children what and who is important to you. They define who you are. In What is a Family? by Edith Scheffer the author talks about the home being a Museum of Memories. The concept is that a museum has a selection of things worth preserving. A family is to be a museum of memories—collections of carefully preserved memories. She suggests that someone in the family needs to be conscious of the fact that memories are important so they plan memories just as someone might plan a museum. This involves taking lots of pictures and organizing them. Remember that what you do today will become tomorrow’s memories and traditions!

Some years ago I presented “Family Traditions for the Home” for a Mother of Preschoolers (MOPS) group. As I prepared the program, I asked my three grown children and son-in-law to share their favorite family memory. The following are some of their memories: 

“Mom would let one of the children choose the entire menu for no particular occasion. Sometimes it was a birthday or another special day, but most of the time it was just an ordinary day. It made us feel great!”

Other holidays, special time, and family gathering rituals and traditions that related to the fall months included: Raking leaves and then rolling in them, carving a pumpkin together, roasting hot dogs in the fireplace and eating them on the floor together at grandma’s, going on camping trips, and going on a hayride, then having hot chocolate and s’mores afterwards.

As we build our home on the firm foundation of Jesus Christ we will find purpose for living, freedom and peace, a confident outlook, receive support from like-minded Christians within our congregation and access to the power of God.

Join us next month as I complete the series on the six traits that build healthy, strong families--helping them manage with stress and survive crisis.

Kay L. Meyer is the president of Family Shield Ministries, host of its radio program, and a popular Christian author and speaker. The Family Shield radio program can be heard on AM 850 KFUO on Saturdays at 11:05 a.m. and Sundays at 7:05 p.m. in St. Louis. It is also heard in nine other stations. To contact Meyer go to: KLMeyer@worldnet.att.net, www.familyshieldministries.com or (314) 772-6070.